From Erin Taylor:
A mom of two young girls came to me extremely frustrated, sad and feeling shameful. She noticed a pattern that she could not break out of – when her 4-year-old daughter would be defiant, this mom would freeze, utterly unsure of what to do or even say. It was as if all her words left her. She simply became triggered and screamed at her daughter, which left both of them feeling awful and disconnected. This pattern had also occurred when her older daughter was about the same age.
During our work together, she was able to connect what was happening currently with her daughter to a traumatic incident that happened to her when she was about the same age. It was a huge a-ha moment when she could finally understand that her daughter’s resistance triggered the traumatic event from her own childhood and took her back to when she was 3 or 4. Her adult self was no longer “in the room” with her daughter now. Instead, her young child was in charge. This is why she literally lost her words – her vocabulary would even shrink back to a preschooler’s. She came up with a mantra to say to herself as she breathed through her daughter’s defiance and she was able to successfully keep her adult self in the room; this allowed her to tap in to her intuition in order to navigate her daughter’s defiance while still staying calmly connected to her, which transformed the entire dynamic in their relationship.
From Louise Clarke:
This particular couple reached out to me regarding some of the challenges they were facing with their three children. From trying to deal with their spirited, strong-willed child, to dealing with sibling rivalry, to not knowing how to support the tantrums and meltdowns and finding that the punishments and rewards they were using were no longer working, they found themselves trapped in the chaos of it all but knew there had to be a better way. We worked together for a couple of months and as part of the process, I asked them to reflect on what their parenting was like before and after parent coaching; what would they have done before as compared to what they would do now, and what they thought the challenges were before coaching as compared to how they now see it.
“It has been interesting to see the change in the mind-shift away from the kids being the problem and now focusing on ourselves for almost every situation. Louise created a safe space where we can talk openly and seriously, get valuable insights, whilst being able to laugh at the same time. Thank you for this.”
TGS and MGS
From Aparna Venkataraman:
I had the pleasure of working with a toddler mom for a month of support – she felt the stress of juggling twin boys, growing and creating content at home for a new online fitness business and being alongside a partner who traveled all the time. We worked together through messaging and essential oil support and also used meditation and breathwork techniques to work on the negative, overwhelming thoughts she had each day.
I showed up as a coach online to help support her business (which was so BEAUTIFUL as she was also empowering other moms to feel great about their bodies and have the energy to do it all) and also meet regularly to find specific oils that she could use to focus while at the computer, diffuse at home to create a relaxing family environment with the oils and also help provide personal relief for her physical fitness. It was AMAZING watching her grow in such a short amount of time – I could even tell while messaging with her that she was becoming much more focused, grounded and positive about everything! What a big GIFT it is to support not only parents but help parents to support one another, too, in their daily lives and careers.
She now is able to have the energy and drive to run her business, build a beautiful and loving community and also be there for her boys in their growth and development. It’s so lovely when she pauses and finds gratitude for her family and career and I’m really grateful for helping her to see that she CAN do all that she wants in the world!
From Tia Fagan:
A single mom, with two daughters, contacted me for parent coaching. She told me how her days had become with filled with conflict and frustration. She described her youngest daughter as incredibly stubborn and how they battled over “everything”. Her voice shook as she told me that she had tried time outs, taking away privileges, counting 1-2-3, and other methods, yet the struggles continued. She shared she was ashamed as she had resorted to yelling on a daily basis. Then with a big exhale, she quietly said “I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like I’m failing as a mom.”
From that first session, she was committed to making a change and things gradually began to shift in her family. We explored the dynamics between herself and her daughters, including her role and any feelings that were coming up, particularly when she was in the middle of a battle with her youngest. She began to see what her daughters were trying to express through their behaviors. She worked diligently over the weeks on her own reactions and also on meeting the needs of her children. She was releasing the traditional parenting methods of control and punishment and embracing understanding and connection. Over our time together, her home became more peaceful, joyful, and compassionate. On our last session, she told me her life had transformed and how the relationships with her daughters have deepened. I’ll never forget the lightness in her voice when she said, “I finally feel confident in my ability to parent, guide, and support my children and be the mom they need me to be.”